Thursday, May 16, 2019

The Elonaya Conspiracy, Part 1

Rebels and skeptics claim that ganking miners in highsec serves no purpose. "That's just griefing, bullying, and harassment," they say. In fact, killing miners serves many useful functions. Among them: Smoking out conspiracies against the Code.

A Hulk pilot who belonged to The Trade Syndecate was ganked by a squad from Mischief Managed. corp while he was mining in the Litiura system. The miner also lost his 443 million isk pod.

The very next day, titaniumbeast lost another Hulk, this time in the Elonaya system. His Hulk fit wasn't any better, but on the inside, the miner had been changed.

Losing two Hulks in two days caused titaniumbeast to become radicalized against the Code. He despised all gankers, whether they were from Mischief Managed., Vigilance Training Bureau, or any other group in the New Order. titaniumbeast vowed to take action against them at the next available opportunity.

Within a few hours, titaniumbeast got his chance when he witnessed a Machariel bumping miners out of the Elonaya ice anomaly. Even worse, the bumper was targeting other members of titaniumbeast's corp, The Trade Syndecate. titaniumbeast chose to do something about it.

And so it was that titaniumbeast encountered Agent TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet. They didn't know it yet, but their chance meeting would have profound consequences for both individuals--and for The Trade Syndecate.
titaniumbeast > i got 2 webs and a scram on orca now
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > titaniumbeast but you don't have what it takes to use them, do you?
The miner armed his Orca and watched TheInternet's Machariel continue bumping miners. TheInternet refused to stop bumping; he doubted that titaniumbeast had the courage to CONCORD his Orca by attacking the Machariel. However, other members of The Trade Syndecate were inspired by titaniumbeast's example. They, too, brought ships into the ice anomaly.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Useless Vexor
titaniumbeast > so ur buds can come in to kill me ya right pussy
titaniumbeast > tough guy fifhtin a mining ship.
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Oh we're not fighting yet
TheInternet watched as various combat ships locked him--but didn't open fire. 'Twas the classic Carebear Stare.
Captain Duke Ghost > you are just a bitch, who parents treated badly.
Captain Duke Ghost > picking on miners with a battleship
TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet > Would you rather I pick on miners with a cruiser?
The miners proved to be incapable of preventing TheInternet from carrying out his work. The ice anomaly was cleansed--for now.

One good citizen of highsec watched these events unfold with growing concern. She suspected The Trade Syndecate of harboring bot-aspirants.

Agent AGBee 001 hated to see unnecessary violence and conflict take place when a diplomatic solution was possible. She went straight to The Trade Syndecate's CEO.
Bladez Runner > i here you wanted to talk to me
AGBee 001 > Hello. Yes indeed. How are you?
Bladez Runner > I am doing fine
AGBee 001 > That's good to hear.
Bladez Runner > And yourself
AGBee 001 > I'm doing well thank you.
Bladez Runner > good, so what can I do for you?
So far, so good. AGBee and the CEO exchanged pleasantries in a cordial manner.
AGBee 001 > The reason I thought we should chat is that you are the CEO of a corporation that has been found to be in systematic violation of the New Halaima Code of Conduct.
AGBee 001 > I'm hoping that we can work out an action plan to get your corporation compliant.
Bladez Runner > Compliant with what/who?
Bladez Runner > Now I have been playing for 5 years
Bladez Runner > And this is new for me
The CEO pleaded total ignorance. Was it true or a lie? AGBee didn't which was more disturbing.
AGBee 001 > I can't say I've met many CEOs of mining corps who haven't heard of the Code.
Bladez Runner > I am well aware of code, so well those bitches wont come to Null Sec
Bladez Runner > I think I know where you are going with this. Sorry to take up your most valuable time.
Bladez Runner > HAve a nice day...
In an instant--and seemingly out of nowhere--the conversation turned sour. Would more violence and conflict be necessary after all?

To be continued...


  1. Mr Runner can run, but he can't hide..

    Praise James \o/

  2. What is it with people using misspellings of the name Blade Runner that causes them to go rogue? There's a crybaby AG on the EVE Forums who goes by the name BIade Runner. You'd think an actual blade runner would be fighting against the bots, not for them, it's their job after all.

  3. Tweeps has her wartime haircut on! These miners stand no chance. Praise James!

  4. Oh look. Yet another Fake Nullsec Vet who for some reason lives in hisec.
    Imagine my shock.
    Shocked, am I.

  5. Put a leesh on this miner by ganking him and his corp.

    Miners should always be reminded they are at the bottom of the food chain.

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