Sunday, October 27, 2019

Kills of the Week

People often decry the bots who plague EVE. Even carebears sometimes claim to be against botting. "But what can I do about it?" they ask. Well, first, you can support the New Order--the only proven, potent defense against bots. Secondly, you can stop being a bot-aspirant. Without bot-aspirants to harbor them, the bots will vanish more rapidly than you can imagine. In short, botting is the fault of the carebears.

Speaking of bot-aspirants, here are some dead ones from the week of October 20th @ 00:00 EVEtime through October 26th @ 23:59 EVEtime...

This week, a tale of two Paladins. 1 Auduin tried to protect her Paladin by clothing it in arrogance and a terrible fit. You see the fit, now here's the arrogance:

1 Auduin thought she could win a battle against Agent Krig Povelli. Tsk.

Paladin number two: Alex Solkrad chose to clothe his ship in bling. But no amount of isk can save a carebear from destruction; only the Code can do that. Agents Ariku Orenuk, Rante Charante, Vlada Inkunen, and Ukira Kunero took aim with their Tornadoes and cost the carebear 5.6 billion isk. And he wasn't even in a hauler!

Judging by Marrcus Chance's experience, though, the carebear wouldn't have fared any better against Tornadoes in a hauler. Agents Ariku Orenuk, Ukira Kunero, and Rante Charante enforced the rules against AFK autopiloting in the Bagodan system.

Illegal mining equipment being smuggled by an illegal hauler. No surprise there.

When CCP nerfed bumping, the carebears assumed that all of their freighters and jump freighters would become safe. But they forgot two important things. First, an AFK autopiloter can't warp no matter how many minutes he spends getting bumped. Second, the power of the Code is awesome. So it was that Lillian Hamabu managed to lose a 19 billion isk jump freighter in a 1.0 security system.

Agents Joel Kusion, Jake Kusion, Jason Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Justin Kusion, Josh Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jax Kusion, Jared Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, Jaiden Kusion, and Homoerotic Finger Painting had plenty of Taloses and plenty of determination. No matter the nerfs, they will see justice done.

Even though she wasn't using ORE Strip Miners, Hollie Berrie lost 825 million isk in a Hulk. How does something like that happen? A little bit of bling here, a few illegal mining drones there... It adds up. Agents Noll Kion and Lisa Tears love killing Hulks anyway, so the fancy killmail was icing on the cake.

Adrionuz tried to hide his 2.6 billion isk pod. Alas, he hid it somewhere that our Agents were bound to go looking: an unlicensed Mackinaw. Once the pod was released, Agent Aaaarrgg did what he does best.

Carebears spend so much time accumulating this trash. I wish they were smart enough to spend their time on things that matter. The Code, for instance.


  1. CCP nerfed bumping. No debate, no requests for comments. They just rolled it in as part of the dial-twisting of "Chaos Era". That was high level strategy at its best—nullblocs always supply and evac using neutral haulers, and being able to interdict them, with sufficient scanning and preparation, was a player-generated marvel.

    1. You could always put all your ganking alts to mining, in nullsec where it belongs.

      What are you and kusion going to do will all those alts, now that bumptackle is limited to 3 minutes?

      Just kill them faster I guess

  2. Both Paladins deserved to die, just for being in hisec.

    Same goes for Ventures.


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