Tuesday, October 29, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 9

Previously, on MinerBumping... anaCheeya ANARKY aka aiva naali aka "kingpin" aka "lil bullet" sallied forth into nullsec to pursue his ambitions. aiva's journey hit a snag when Vincent Vegas--a Goon and supposedly an ally--killed his unfit cruiser. Unbeknownst to aiva, Vincent had been tipped off to aiva's location by Agent Aiko Danuja.


aiva had big plans for nullsec--and his place in it. With his penchant for designing superweapons that no one else had ever thought of, aiva believed he could reshape nullsec to suit his whims. For now, though, he was stuck mining in highsec. Good thing he had a permit.


aiva toiled away in highsec asteroid belts awaiting the results of a Goon "security check". He didn't look like much, but it was only a matter of time before he let a few things slip.


Agent Aiko directed aiva to a public channel for New Order Logistics corp. That way, aiva could meet some fellow travelers while he was in exile. This, however, proved to be a dangerous temptation.


Finding himself in a relaxed and inviting environment, aiva spoke freely. Too freely.


aiva couldn't resist sharing secrets with his new friends. And they, in turn, were fascinated by what he had to say.


Like a Parisian café, rumors of revolution wafted through NOL's public channel. aiva found himself at the center of attention.


...And he liked it.


To aiva's delight, rumors of one of his superweapons had preceded him. Once the phrase "skank trap" was uttered, there was no stopping him.


aiva's audience encouraged him to reveal more, but the miner needed no encouragement. In speaking about them, he felt his fantastic visions were finally becoming a reality.


aiva's precious secrets spilled freely into the NOL public channel. He felt that he was among friends--but who else was listening?


Even in such a comfortable atmosphere, aiva should have been alarmed by the degree of specificity with which his friends questioned him. Did they really need all of these technical details?


Security concerns were out the window. In fact, they were long gone. Before long, aiva was sketching diagrams of his plans:


So far, it was all fun and games. But if word leaked out, things could go bad in a hurry.

To be continued...

Monday, October 28, 2019

The Best Revenge, Part 8

Previously, on MinerBumping... anaCheeya ANARKY donned the guise of aiva naali, a newly created character. Despite many setbacks, aiva remained ambitious--and deeply committed to his nullsec project.


With the aid of Agent Aiko Danuja and other friends from the New Order, aiva hoped to regain access to Imperium space. So far, he was making good progress. They don't call him "lil bullet" for nothing.


aiva took Agent Aiko into his confidence. The miner made no secret of his addiction to skill injectors, though he never mentioned how he was able to afford so many of them.


The most perilous part of aiva's journey began. The miner held his breath and jumped into nullsec.


Remarkably, aiva managed to make his way into nullsec without issue. Aiko's connections in Goon high command were paying off.


Upon receiving instructions from Aiko, aiva announced his presence and prepared to advance to the next system on his list.


Disaster struck.


Adding insult to injury, the pilot who attacked him was a Goon. Was it a miscommunication of some sort?


In the heat of battle, Vincent Vegas also popped aiva's pod, sending him right back to where he started.


What Vincent didn't realize is that aiva was no ordinary blank-fit Thorax pilot. In fact, the miner had detailed plans on how to create superweapons and destroy the Imperium.


As usual, the diplomatic Agent Aiko managed to save the day.


After taking a few moments to reflect, aiva decided to forgive the unwarranted attack and go offline to attend a prior engagement. However, there was more to aiva's chance encounter with Vincent than met the eye. Just prior to the incident, the following conversation took place in a private channel:


At the risk of jumping to conclusions, it appeared that Aiko--the person aiva trusted the most--may have actually been playing both sides. How would aiva react when he discovered the truth?

To be continued...

Sunday, October 27, 2019

Kills of the Week

People often decry the bots who plague EVE. Even carebears sometimes claim to be against botting. "But what can I do about it?" they ask. Well, first, you can support the New Order--the only proven, potent defense against bots. Secondly, you can stop being a bot-aspirant. Without bot-aspirants to harbor them, the bots will vanish more rapidly than you can imagine. In short, botting is the fault of the carebears.

Speaking of bot-aspirants, here are some dead ones from the week of October 20th @ 00:00 EVEtime through October 26th @ 23:59 EVEtime...



This week, a tale of two Paladins. 1 Auduin tried to protect her Paladin by clothing it in arrogance and a terrible fit. You see the fit, now here's the arrogance:


1 Auduin thought she could win a battle against Agent Krig Povelli. Tsk.



Paladin number two: Alex Solkrad chose to clothe his ship in bling. But no amount of isk can save a carebear from destruction; only the Code can do that. Agents Ariku Orenuk, Rante Charante, Vlada Inkunen, and Ukira Kunero took aim with their Tornadoes and cost the carebear 5.6 billion isk. And he wasn't even in a hauler!



Judging by Marrcus Chance's experience, though, the carebear wouldn't have fared any better against Tornadoes in a hauler. Agents Ariku Orenuk, Ukira Kunero, and Rante Charante enforced the rules against AFK autopiloting in the Bagodan system.


Illegal mining equipment being smuggled by an illegal hauler. No surprise there.



When CCP nerfed bumping, the carebears assumed that all of their freighters and jump freighters would become safe. But they forgot two important things. First, an AFK autopiloter can't warp no matter how many minutes he spends getting bumped. Second, the power of the Code is awesome. So it was that Lillian Hamabu managed to lose a 19 billion isk jump freighter in a 1.0 security system.

Agents Joel Kusion, Jake Kusion, Jason Kusion, Jayson Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Justin Kusion, Josh Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Jax Kusion, Jared Kusion, Jacob Kusion, Jeremy Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Joshua Kusion, Johnathan Kusion, Jeffery Kusion, Jaiden Kusion, and Homoerotic Finger Painting had plenty of Taloses and plenty of determination. No matter the nerfs, they will see justice done.



Even though she wasn't using ORE Strip Miners, Hollie Berrie lost 825 million isk in a Hulk. How does something like that happen? A little bit of bling here, a few illegal mining drones there... It adds up. Agents Noll Kion and Lisa Tears love killing Hulks anyway, so the fancy killmail was icing on the cake.



Adrionuz tried to hide his 2.6 billion isk pod. Alas, he hid it somewhere that our Agents were bound to go looking: an unlicensed Mackinaw. Once the pod was released, Agent Aaaarrgg did what he does best.


Carebears spend so much time accumulating this trash. I wish they were smart enough to spend their time on things that matter. The Code, for instance.

Saturday, October 26, 2019

Highsec Miner Grab Bag #195

One problem with highsec miners is that they don't thank the gankers enough. But even when they do, it can come across as passive-aggressive:


BlackHorn Khan kicked off today's edition of the Highsec Miner Grab Bag by thanking Agent Krig Povelli. Was it a sincere expression of thanks? Time to find out:


Looks like he didn't really mean it.


Anti-Gankers still don't understand what a criminal is.


Expressions used by miners can be cryptic, especially if the miner doesn't speak English. For instance, did this miner refer to the Roman Romulus, or the Star Trek one?


Hex Mallory was ganked in a Venture, so if he truly wasn't mining, then he was loitering. In fairness, though, he must be a very new player--he hasn't picked up the "don't gank me because subscription revenues" line yet!


...And here come the questions:


Since the miner quotes from the Code a few times, it looks like he's read it. Friend, my advice to you is to read the Code again and see if you have fewer questions.


Russian miner Morigan Orti only spoke English with the aid of Google Translate, but her frustration was palpable...


Our Agents care about many things. Pizzaballa is certainly one of them. But what they care about most of all is this: the Code.


It's amazing what highsec carebears can get away with. I mean, if I was the one calling the carebears "garbage", people would accuse me of bigotry!


Kaal aan repeatedly accused our Agents of killing minors. Without going further into detail, I can assure you that this is not the case.


Protip: If you want to get your Mackinaw reimbursed because you had to go do "something" IRL, then you had better tell me what that "something" was. Even so, I'll just leave this here.

Friday, October 25, 2019

Legacy of Lahnius, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Anti-Ganker Lahnius barked warnings at the AFK carebears in the Nakugard system--to no avail. Despite Lahnius' best efforts, Agent shootyou longtyme had no difficulty punishing the Code violators.


Deeply bitter about the ganks that had occurred on his watch, Lahnius sought solace from the approval of his alt, Hoo Jorgan. But he fooled no one.


Lahnius got a taste of his own medicine when Agent shootyou was backed up by a corpmate of his own, Amanhara.


shootyou was not a member of the mighty CODE. alliance. But Lahnius was confident that by ranting in local chat, he would draw a CODE. fleet to Nakugard. It didn't happen.


Having cleared the system of non-compliant miners, our heroes went in search of Code-violators elsewhere. The lack of an audience never discouraged Lahnius, though. In fact, it tended to inspire him.


Lahnius loved nothing better than to pour out a soliloquy into an otherwise empty local chat.


A few weeks later, one Captain Ivana Gankalot happened to be passing through Nakugard when she stumbled upon Lahnius mid-soliloquy.


Because Captain Ivana missed the opening act, she didn't know who or what had set Lahnius off this time. But Captain Ivana had arrived in Nakugard at the right moment, because Lahnius was about to spill secrets about CODE.


According to Lahnius, he had once infiltrated so deeply into CODE. that he'd been offered the keys to the kingdom: The account of the Saviour of Highsec. With Lahnius' level of access, he could have disbanded CODE. and taken the vast New Order Treasury for himself. Instead, he chose to do nothing. This noble decision somehow resulted in the defeat of Agent Alt 00.

According to Lahnius.


Without warning, Lahnius' speech was rudely interrupted.


Enraged, Lahnius threatened to "mark" Deimos Barret.


Though not affiliated with the New Order, Deimos had made an enemy of Lahnius--who was already plotting his revenge.

To be continued...