Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Cassidy's Final Ships

After all this time, carebears are still blowing billions of isk on bounties. I warned them against such waste even before the current bounty system was put into place. Still they throw away their money. The good news is that our Agents can collect these bounties by firing on each other at the conclusion of a gank. The bad news is that lazy carebears' disinterest in game mechanics is another sign of rampant bot-aspirancy.


Cassidy Langley had a grudge against Agent Tisiphone Dira. Our heroine did what the New Order does best: She taught the carebear how EVE works. Cassidy didn't care. Why would a carebear want to know the rules of the game they're playing, right?


Once again, the highly trained Agent was able to elicit a full confession from the carebear--without resorting to the use of torture.


Cassidy spilled the beans: She wasn't a dangerous bounty hunter; she was down to only three ships. She'd lost almost all her isk on "gambling".


The carebear was destitute. Agent Tisiphone took pity on her, and discouraged her from wasting time on PI. The New Order to the rescue, as usual.


Now Cassidy was down to two ships. She should've spent her isk on a mining permit, rather than gambling. Indeed, flying around highsec without a permit is the most deadly gamble of all.


Little miss motor-mouth admitted to another crime: Fail-fitting her ship.


Cassidy vowed revenge on the New Order. She would find some way to defeat us, using either her Venture or her Catalyst. Or maybe her Venture would get ganked, and she would join us to gank miners with her Catalyst.

There are some misguided people out there who read MinerBumping and find themselves identifying with the criminal miners. If you see Cassidy as a poor, defenseless newbie, maybe you think she was wronged by Tisiphone. Think again. Tisiphone remained in local and observed the following interaction:


So much for protecting the new players, eh? Seems that's our job.

40 comments:

  1. This foul language violates both the New Order's Code and the Heroes of Highsec's soon-to-be-released Code. Tsk Tsk

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. how many highsec miners does it take to screw in a lightbulb? trick question, you'll never find any atk to help. good luck herding them all, thinking of giving you some isk to watch you try.

      Delete
    2. The rebel "code" has not yet been released because the miners are still waiting for somebody else to do it for them?

      Delete
    3. No, it just needs more money. Held needs your money to finish writing "New Code." Otherwise, he simply won't be bothered with ungrateful carebears. Simple enough.

      Delete
  2. Well, I have to admit this, for once here is a new order target who got ganked, who i wont bother to help or give isk. I dislike new order and im willing to help most anyone they go against, but i dislike someone like this who is vulger AND gambles. Perhaps if she would change her ways, but i doubt that will happen.

    -=M=-

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  3. The Code ALWAYS wins!!!! ALWAYS!!!!

    And whether it's your last of first ship, you can always count on the New Order to follow through with our word!

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    Replies
    1. You certainly followed through in the last Alliance Tournament.

      Oh wait, no you didn't, you cried and left before even firing a shot because you realised you'd be up against ships that would fire back at you. So sad that you believe your own nonsense even when reality and facts define you up as liars.

      Delete
    2. If you recall, CODE. was the most talked-about team at the Alliance Tournament, hands-down. We caused one of the highest isk-losses for any single team, and single-handedly defeated Clockwork Pineapple in ship-to-ship combat.
      I don't know where you're getting your "news" from, but it most certainly isn't from an unbiased source like Minerbumping.com.

      Please change your news sources to something that doesn't make you look dumb. I'll even throw you a bone.

      http://www.minerbumping.com/2014/08/code-wows-at-alliance-tournament.html

      Delete
    3. Have you ever heard the term "All Press is Good Press?"

      If you go by that (true) metric, then CODE. came out of Alliance Tournament XII as the real winners, because, I don't think it's disputable that CODE. was the alliance that literally everyone couldn't stop talking about.

      I mean look at you. You're bringing up our victory at the tournament even now. I'll bet you can't even remember another match at the Alliance Tournament, except maybe the final.

      Delete
    4. In a tournament where shooting other ships is the basis for winning, Ming & CODE believe that them cowering away and running scared, shooting no ships in the process is somehow a victory.

      Alas, the history on this is still accurate and your attempt at revision has failed. As I said, I do feel so very sorry for you. Though being so far detached from reality could have it's positives I guess. You are certainly king in your own little world, just not the real one.

      Delete
    5. What do you mean, we shot no ships? Ming provided you a link which documents how we shot down and blew up a whoooole lot of tournament ships, and more efficiently than any of our competitors. Try checking the facts before embarrassing yourself next time, Anon@2:16.

      Delete
    6. Respectfully, I do believe you are the one who is "detached from reality."

      If there are two things that the New Order is indisputably and universally known for, it is: 1.) Shooting ships, and 2.) Winning.

      In fact, (as you can read about in the unbiased news link I gave you above,) CODE. Alliance Executor loyalanon was so completely hellbent by the need to "shoot more ships" that CODE. completely discarded training for the Alliance Tournament- and indeed the Alliance Tournament itself, because shooting ships and spreading the word of the Code was so much more important than fighting in a fake arena with fake rules.

      And what came of it? In the end, CODE. shot more ships, destroyed more isk, and took out entire Alliance Tournament teams- without even being in the arena. That's how powerful The Code is. We don't even have to show up to win. Because we come. we break every rule, and we push every limit. And we win. And everyone (well, at least you) will be talking about our victory for years to come.

      Delete
    7. Oh, and the preceding was directed @Anon2:16, not Maria.

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    8. Heh, I figured.

      Delete
    9. Maria im guessing has to be blonde, she perfectly fits the sterotype of a dumb blonde. Dont get me wrong maria, i tend to like blondes, i just dont care for the ditzy ones like you. Code didnt win the tourny, hell code barely managed to make it there. Soon as code saw there was *gasp* guns pointing their way they tucked tail and logged off. Code thought they would embarass everyone by doing that, but all they did was embarass themselves. Yea, we still talk about it, but its while we laugh at the dumbass codes who lost the tourny by withdrawing and forfiting the tourny. Get your news from legit sources, and those are not minerbumping.com or themittani.com as neither is a real news source, just fan fiction websites.

      -=M=-

      Delete
    10. *I'm, *I, *I, *didn't, *tourney, *were, *Yeah, *it's, *tourney, *forfeiting, *tourney

      Tsk tsk, M. I'm sure you can do better than this.

      Delete
    11. @Anon4:40
      Incorrect, as always "M." We didn't "barely make it" to the tournament- It was declared it "beneath our stature" and as such, we decided to go win the tournament in other ways. Call it "emergent gameplay" or whatever you want, the fact is: We still did our fair share of ass-kicking during that tournament, and in terms of isk destroyed and fame gained, I don't think even you can argue that the New Order came out well ahead of our competition. As I said before- When you think of Alliance Tournament XII, you think of Camel Empire, and CODE.

      And as for Maria being blonde? vOv I like Maria, even if she's a blonde. It certainly beats being old. I mean you're even forgetting how things happened not even a year ago, "grandpa."

      (Also I very much doubt that you can "forfit" a tournament.)

      Delete
    12. When i think of the alliance tournament i think of how code did what their name stands for, Chicken Out, Deny Everything.
      Well at least since Code is banned from any future tournaments we wont have losers rage quiting because the only 2 ships they can fly are removed.
      In the end Code was still the biggest losers at the tournament, even if code cant admit their failure. Its no big suprise thou, seeing how code agents dock up and hide when someone has any guns. Here is to CODE., the biggest rage quiters of the tournament. :)

      -=M=-

      Delete
    13. @Anon5:22
      You repeat yourself M! Again and again and again- and you say that I'm the one with the repeating problem!

      The truth is, time after time, CODE. has proven ourselves just as capable at fighting ships that shoot back as those that refuse to. But apparently, M, you skip over all of those glorious victories we publish and skip straight to the comments to write your own fanboy stories about the New Order.

      We all enjoy laughing at you, as well as persistent inability to spell.

      Love,
      Ming

      Delete
    14. Ooh, M, have you considered writing your fanfiction somewhere where it'll remain visible from day to day? We do have forums you know, and there is a rich tradition of carebears posting fanfiction about how they "totally fought and killed New Order Agents, no really you guys it was totally sweet". If you're going to devote hours of every day to writing here, you might as well do it somewhere where your contributions and fictions will be able to build naturally on themselves, instead of having to reinvent the wheel every couple of days.

      Oh, and in the spirit of helping the less fortunate: *I, *I, *won't, *two, *were, *can't, *It's, *though, *whenever, *quitters.

      Delete
    15. it's pretty clear for anyone watching from the sidelines the the new order won the tourney. Saying otherwise is just denial.

      Delete
    16. LOL, i love how much ming and maria get upset when you point out that code totaly failed at the tournament. Perhaps they believe if they keep saying they won then someone will believe them.
      Keep believing in james you simple fools, just remember what the middle 3 letters are in believe.

      -=M=-

      Delete
    17. @Anon8:30

      But if we take the 3rd, 4th, 5th, and 6th letters of "believe," and then use your spelling, we get "live."

      And that is what we the carebear to do. How to live. Properly. Through death.

      Delete
    18. Let me correct that.
      "And that is what we 'teach' the carebear to do."

      Delete
    19. please ming, stop failing so much.
      You make it easy for us to laugh about you :)

      -=M=-

      Delete
  4. Last or first ship ming.
    New order doesn't follow their own word, unless you count the lies from their criminal organization .
    Quite honestly new order loses so much at the game I'm amazed any of you clowns are still here. Of course there is that saying about not being able to teach an old dog new tricks. Guess there using much else for ming to do since he fails at everything else.
    Love you ming, you wonderful and simple snowflake.

    -=M=-

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, okay M. So we "so we don't keep our word, unless you count the lies?"

      #carebearlogic

      *loses so much at the game
      *says we fail
      *wonderful and simple snowflake
      *can't teach an old dog new tricks

      Delete
    2. Very good ming! very good!
      your getting good at repeating.
      Now repeat these sentences.
      I ming got scammed out of 11 billion isk.
      I ming belong to a criminal orginization.
      I ming and stuuuped and follow james the wanabe.
      I ming cant do anything good so i stick my nose up james rear to worship him.

      -=M=-

      Delete
    3. @Anon4:35
      You're seriously dumber than a box of two-dollar hammers, aren'tcha?

      Delete
    4. *Very, *You're, *organization, *stupid, *wannabe, *can't, *I, *James'

      Son, I am disappoint.

      Delete
    5. You 2 should not be saying anything the way you lied earlier. Yes you did blowup Clockwork Pineapple's tournament ships, but it was not a tournament event, therefore code did not fire a shot in the tournament, and did not get a win. The only match code was scheduled for you did not show up for, therefore it is a forfeit (per CCP), which is a LOSS, again code did not fire a shot in a tournament event and did not win. This site is not unbiased, it is totally biased towards jamies rehetoric that it is sickening at times...buying your permits is a loosing proposition...one who bows to the new order and it's code gives up their freedom...you permit cost you claim is 10M isk, but what you don't inform people of is their loss of freedom...you will never get total compliance because there will never be enough of you to force the people that value their freedom in the game to follow your rules...the code is founded on lies and propagates lies and you cannot prove otherwise...

      Delete
    6. Get me my economy reports, EconomyAnon.

      Delete
    7. Anon@9:51

      Seems like you're scrambling to impose arbitrary conditions in order to somehow not classify our victory as a win. The goal of a tournament is to destroy the other teams' ships while preserving your own, yes? And that's what we did, with unparalleled efficiency. In my book (and that of any other impartial observers) that's a win.

      Yet another resounding CODE. victory!

      Delete
  5. A concerned MinmatarMarch 11, 2015 at 10:37 AM

    Well, gambling is player interaction... sort of. She might not be completely lost. I'm hoping for a redemption story here!

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  6. why all the hate on mining?
    unless its a scam, someone gambling has a chance of winning.
    even if the chance to win is low, thats WAY better then mining without a permit or flying untanked industrials.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that should read : why all the hate on gambling of cause.
      stupid me. in my defense, brainworms eat my lunch.

      Delete
  7. Cassidy Langley is a very angry person. I think she needs to take a step back from the computer.

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  8. https://forums.eveonline.com/default.aspx?g=posts&t=367694

    Yeah sorry CCP is more accurate than minerbumping

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  9. cassidy and veers sitting in a tree
    K-I-S-S-I-N-G
    first comes love, then comes a mining alt with a fail fit covetor.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Umm, really? Scamming in Cluster (and other rookie systems) is bankable I thought.

    ReplyDelete

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