Friday, January 25, 2013

Gagged to Death

We all know that the Code requires miners to be courteous in local and refrain from the use of profanity. So does the EULA, sort of. On occasion, rebel miners are reported to CCP for abusing their local privileges.

scrapmetal joe was stunned by the punishment he received: Thirty whole minutes without the ability to speak in local.

scrapmetal didn't like the idea of CCP getting involved in the conflict between the New Order and the miners. Perhaps that's because the New Order always follows the rules, while the increasingly desperate miners are more willing to tread outside the lines.

For months, the Agents of the New Order have been the subject of petitions from literally hundreds of miners--perhaps thousands, by now. Miners have openly advocated changing the rules to ban New Order activities, including both bumping and suicide ganking. But when the miners get petitioned, their attitudes about CCP change dramatically.

scrapmetal vowed revenge, which would be coming Soon™. At this point, miner vengeance has to be considered some kind of vaporware.

Having spoken his peace, scrapmetal prepared to depart from the scene.

...But he didn't. scrapmetal continued to complain, arguing that CCP is the only thing that stands between him and the ability to smooth-talk us into oblivion. Before you know it, the New Order will turn highsec into a risk-free theme park MMO.

Sometimes letting off some steam helps people cool down. Not so for scrapmetal. He had been gagged for thirty minutes, and now his rant about it threatened to go on longer than the gag itself.

scrapmetal was convinced Agent Singular Snowflake was the one who ratted him out to the authorities. Our Agents are indeed hard core--hard core for the Code.

With the eye of CCP ever upon him, scrapmetal's powers were severely diminished. He wouldn't be able to take down the New Order alone.

scrapmetal quoted GM Smiley, who had administered the gag. The words were seared into scrapmetal's soul.

Could nothing end the pain scrapmetal felt about his 30-minute gag? He should talk to his AFK miner friends. They often go months at a time without saying a word in local.

The burden of having been gagged weighed heavily upon scrapmetal. Two days later, he returned to the system to announce that he was considering biomassing himself, for the sake of the other characters on his account. He also seemed to think it would serve as some sort of protest.

True to his word, scrapmetal joe self-immolated, the nearly one year-old character permanently erased from EVE. Rest in peace, scrapmetal. Local won't be the same without you.


  1. The best kind of miner is a biomassed miner ! \o/

    Also, I appreciate you folks working hard to keep local chat clean.

    Often times my daughter watches me play and it pains me that she observes the language some of these filthy rebels use.

  2. Truly the New Order is powerful, for it can kill immortals.

    -Galaxy Pig

  3. People like Scrapmetal Joe, who are unable to engage in civilised discussion, are exactly the CCP have to have rules about foul language. I'm staggered by the number of his EULA violations in those post-gag screenshots.

  4. How bizarre.

    He didn't even consider selling his miner?

    Wow. That's several PLEX worth of ISK down the drain for a year old character, even for a miner.

  5. scrapmetal joe's memory provides us with a perfect example of the tumultuousness change can bring.
    a man of many words he was, but a man of his word also, this should not be overlooked.
    "give me liberty or give me death", words many have put forth to express their dedication. for joe it was "give me a mining laser, im gonna go afk for an hour, then come back and act like my parents failed to teach me how to act like a mature member of the human race".
    i believe joes self-immolation was a penance, and while he did appear to reject The Code, my suspicion is that we will see joe within the next 30 days with at the top of his bio and a stabber in the hangar.

  6. The misplaced anger was strong with this one. May you find peace and harmony where-ever you are are now scrapmetal joe.

    - Guybertini

  7. I guess he tried to reprocess some scrap metal, but ended up reprocessing the most expensive piece of scrap metal he had: joe

    1. I wonder if he had Scrapmetal Processing trained?

  8. "its a nice way to make money, but also a nice way get CCP's attention"

    What exactly did he mean by that..? o.0
    I sincerely hope he wasn't expecting some kind of official reimbursement..

  9. Oh well. I guess he liked it better with a CCP ball-gag in his mouth.

  10. Stopped reading at

    "scrapmetal joe was stunned by the punishment he received"

    as it's rather obvious he was stunned that someone was childish enough to run crying straight to the teacher over a naughty word that was said.

    Is this whole blog based around making stuff up? Or should I continue reading as this was just a one off? I don't want to waste my time unnecessarily.


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