Wednesday, September 10, 2014

The Stream of Justice, Part 1


One never knows the time or the place where a Code violation might occur in highsec. This is why our Agents remain vigilant. They are always ready to leap into action.
Lord Jasta > http://www.twitch.tv/ziminiar
Lord Jasta > Look at the twitch channel
Lord Jasta > mining with no delay
Lord Jasta > fuck it Im taking kac
Lord Jasta > *kav
BeBopAReBop RhubarbPie > do we know the system on that?
Lord Jasta > oh he covered it lol
Agent Lord Jasta discovered an illegal miner broadcasting his crimes across the internet. In doing so, the miner was encouraging others to do likewise. It was time for the New Order to teach him some things that they don't cover in the official EVE tutorial.


The Twitch streamer had the foresight to obscure the portion of his screen that displayed the name of the system. However, our crack team of analysts quickly deduced the miner's location based on the stargates shown on his overview.


A desperate attempt was made on the miner's Retriever when it undocked from the station. The attempt failed. Would this spook the Agents' prey?
Tengu Grib > Hey Mildron, from what you saw, did he even notice the catalysts?
Mildron Klinker > he cant see anybody, local is in his chat windows left side
Mildron Klinker > he has rookie help active
Tengu Grib > So even if he COULD have seen it, he may not have seen it.
Mildron Klinker > he's watching another screen too much :D
Tengu Grib > yeah he may have missed it altogether.
Mildron Klinker > he's watching another stream
Once again, a miner was doomed by his own bot-aspirancy. He didn't even notice that the attack had taken place; he was preoccupied with other windows on his computer.


The miner returned to extract additional ore. As this was taking place in a 1.0 security system, there was no margin for error. Our Agents formed a new plan.
Mildron Klinker > grab your mining vessel buddy :P
Mildron Klinker > go go go, we want explosions :D
Zawaka Kasenumi > try to catch which belt he warps to
Mildron Klinker > my god so much time to change ony fucking drones
Mildron Klinker > yes, press undock please :P
Mildron Klinker > he watched your wrecks too :P
BeBopAReBop RhubarbPie > planet 8 belt 1
Mildron Klinker > VIII belt 1 yep
As our Agents anticipated, the miner continued his Code violations. He had no idea what awaited him. Clearly, he was not a MinerBumping reader.


Due to the unique circumstances of this gank, our heroes judged it necessary to bring out the heavy artillery. Was it overkill? Not at all. An action taken in the name of the Code is always worth the cost.


You could cut the tension with a knife. It was now or never.


Victory! The fail-fit Retriever was obliterated.


A wave of joy was felt all across the highsec community!
Kav Kraken > o/
Kav Kraken > How are you today?
Zhinso Wang > sup
Kav Kraken > We are here to save you from your non emergent ways
Kav Kraken > Would you like to know why you were destroyed?
Zhinso Wang > yea
But the destruction of the Twitch streamer's vessel was only the beginning. The New Order isn't about killing miners--it's about saving them. If this carebear could be rescued from bot-aspirancy, his salvation would be broadcast live on Twitch. Our Agents prepared themselves for the real battle, the battle of ideas.

To be continued...

76 comments:

  1. Another wonderful victory by brave agents of the New Order!

    ON WE PLOW!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've seen better kills and tears than that piece of tissue you call a mail, forgive my intrusion but I represent myself as a self proclaimed pirate from another MMO sandbox. I'm not sure if you've ever heard of Elite Dangerous the new upcoming space simulator that's currently in open beta. If you're interested in learning the ways of space piracy, DJ Entropy. I have heard of rigging ships with explosives, to intense pvping with the local miners, and once it is released sometime next year I am offering CODE a chance to try Elite Dangerous. Since you pick on miners on Eve, how about giving Elite Dangerous a try.

      I pick on my miners on Elite, so I am opening the portal to both universes Eve and Elite Dangerous by sending this message to CODE. After all I am offering you guys a partnership, because we have similar interests.

      Delete
    2. Thanks! It's in my list of games to check out, but my heart is pretty much stuck with EVE for now. Was a bit fan of the original back in my Commodore 64 days :) However, no more expensive betas for me until Wasteland II is released :)

      I'll look you up once Elite goes live! :-)

      Delete
    3. I also intend to try Elite Dangerous, it looks pretty cool and I'm willing to give it a shot. :D

      Delete
  2. The Code always wins! I'm so proud of our brave Knights, such quick and intelligent thinking to slay the bot aspirant. I hope part 2 shows a transformation from evil bot aspirant miner to one of the good guys.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Co-operation and sacrifice are as evident in the New Order as they are absent from the efforts of the rebels of Highsec. For all their bluster in the anti-ganking channel, they are, in the final analysis, impotent.

    Long live the Saviour of Highsec! Long live the New Order!

    ReplyDelete
  4. so lame....Can we at least get James to write these posts again? The content will still be third rate (we killed....wait for it....a RETRIEVER!!!!), but at least the verbiage will be compelling (as opposed to James over coms...where he is well.....kind of flat).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. First cast the beam out of thine own eye and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote of thy Savior's eye.

      Delete
  5. Just goes to show that ALL of HighSec is CODE sov space! In the end every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that James 315 is the Savior of HighSec! Repent Carebears or be destroyed by the mighty lion!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Very heroic tale, kudos boys!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh man, that my friends is how the pros do it. Improvise, Adapt & Overcome.

    Yet non Code believers still claim ganking is easy!

    The Code always wins. \o/

    ReplyDelete
  8. A act of heroism that brings honor to us all. A beautiful reclamation of illegal mining equipment in a 1.0 system. Bravo all!

    ReplyDelete
  9. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rb5B2SI3l6U

    Special thanks to Mildron for recording the gank! (You can skip to 18:00 if you want to just see the gank itself, not much happens)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Tengu and Mildron; on my way over there now...

      Delete
    2. Hey, Tengu, all of it was good. Showed the greedy miner for what he is. The gank was great - sudden and final. But what about the ending? That cute little pod, shameful remainder of all his efforts, suspended in its hangar while Zhinso Wang strokes his beard in bewilderment. Classic!

      Delete
    3. All excellent points Sasha. Unfortunately the recording does not include the post gank discussion with Zhinso. Poor Mildrons computer had already been recording for close to an hour before we finally got him.

      Delete
  10. Trashers>>>Catalysts in a 1.0

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are absolutely correct. Their Alpha more than makes up for the fewer shots. We worked with what we had though.

      Delete
  11. The Stream of Justice hit today, all right.

    http://www.reddit.com/r/Eve/comments/2g0myx/blanket_ban_on_bonus_room_participants/

    https://forums.eveonline.com/default.aspx?g=posts&t=372621

    Justice For All!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Griefer tears, best tears.

      Now take down this blog, your time in this game is over.

      Delete
  12. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good. This type of shameful behavior has no place in Eve.

      Delete
    2. My original comment was regarding the video showing the gank, not for the above link which was not yet posted. Not that I disagree with CCP Falcon stated. The EULA is there for a reason.

      Delete
    3. Personally I would never be part of something like that... it goes a bit too far. You are definitely walking a thin line. Best to keep your scams "ingame".

      I also believe that people need to take personal responsibility for their own actions. Those that "willing" go into such things, really need to rethink their choice, and if they continue should except the consequences of said choice.

      It's like responding to the "Nigerian email scam". You KNOW it's bogus, but even so some people just got to try. In those cases, you take your lumps.

      Delete
    4. Too bad the anonymous person did not post their name as this could be conceived as out of game harassment..... Man up post with your toon.

      Delete
    5. So you can harrass them with your alt goon? Or a mercenary contract? Or...
      Lord Pflasta, BRAIN up

      Delete
    6. Lol
      "Everyone I don't like is a Goon alt!"
      You're funny.

      Delete
  13. cODE. Once again gets banned this time it's from the game. Good riddance. Let the peace and prosperity commence!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. http://www.reddit.com/r/Eve/comments/2g24cl/massive_banwave_hits_the_dark_side_of_eve/

      Good - hopefully all the despicable griefers are now gone. Wonder if James 315 got the axe?

      Delete
    2. CCP always wins, another great day for EVE!

      Delete
    3. Those without triumphs
      crow at any word from Devs
      Wait and see, grasshopper

      Delete
  14. so you went all them jumps just to gank a retriever? and you think you win cause of it? anyone with half a braincell is laughing at how lame you are

    ReplyDelete
  15. ..and those with full capacity see the excitement of public gank. It's fun, it's intense, you should try it.

    ReplyDelete
  16. HEY CODE.!!! You LOST! hahahaha enjoy the ban bitches! CCP does not WANT you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. They don't want you carebears either, otherwise gankin would not be possible. Ban for AFK:ers and another ban for scammers/griefers and we are all set.

      Delete
    2. From the forums....is DJ really gone for good?

      The fact that there is even discussion here just shows how disconnected people are from actual reality.

      While it saddens me that DJ got banned,
      I understand the decision behind it completely.


      The hard part is making him realise himself .......

      Delete
    3. Indeed, this is wonderful news.

      Delete
    4. DJ deserves his cat to be wrangled by a telephone line.

      Delete
    5. Why the hate for cats? :(

      I don't think the cat is to blame here.

      Delete
    6. Still here, still kicking, not "banned" or whatever people are claiming :)

      Sorry I don't have any drama for you.

      @Anon744AM - All my cats can pwn any type of "telephone line" or other wire/cable like substance. Duh. Long cat is Loooooooooooooooooooong.

      @Anon805AM - OMG I see what you did there! So subtle and clever, just the type of shiptoasting we have grown to know and love :)

      Delete
    7. Can confirm that the New Order catpack is one mean gang of kitties that doesn't afraid of nobody.

      Delete
    8. Still here, still enforcing the Code.

      Delete
  17. FALCON PUNCH!

    Right in the cock.

    Nice to see the griefers' self-assumed air of invulnerability has a resist hole after all. Moar banz for CODErs plz, CCP Falcon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hehe.. I assume you are the same "genious" who posted the comment at 7:44 AM :D

      Delete
    2. I was still asleep at 7.44 am. Although I *do* endorse the destruction of a pixellated avatar's imaginary internet space cats.

      Delete
    3. Still here, just logged in a second ago to update a contest and move some things around. Sorry to disappoint you!

      It's well known that I have always played by the rules and followed the EULA. I hear some people got banned today, but I am sure things will work out just fine :)

      Delete
    4. if the code bandits are gone why are you posting anonymously?

      Delete
    5. The code always wins!!!!

      Delete
    6. :)
      it might...
      however if code-monkeys aren't to stupid, they would realize, that they are not really on the safe side. petitions for harrassment are taken more and more seriously. what will code-monkeys do? continue until they get the bann hammer and then cry a river that the rules weren't clear.

      Delete
    7. Those who suck at game
      cry and whine for a rule change
      If they win, all lose

      Delete
    8. @wen tang: I post anonymously because I can. What is the difference between interacting here pseudonymously (eg "wen tang", "DJ Entropy", "James 315") and anonymously? Why are *you* so interested in my identity? Is it because you would wish to harass me in-game because I disagreed with you in an out of game forum?

      I'm pleased with the latest batch of CCP bans not because I object to people blowing up other people's internet spaceships, but because I just don't like the arrogance and "we are untouchable" mentality that has been adopted by some of the people doing the blowing up of said spaceships. DJ Entropy is a good example of this when he says above: "It's well known that I have always played by the rules and followed the EULA." That may be the case; I don't care enough about him to study his in-game existence and activities.

      Hence, CCP Falcon's "Falcon Punch" is a very interesting, amusing, and satisfying piece of news:
      "We will not draw a line in the sand so that people can skirt on the edge of it and bend the rules as much as possible. This isn't a debate about what constitutes "harassment". If you're not familiar with the word, find the definition in a dictionary and that will satisfy your question. What we will do, is continue to use best judgement on a case by case basis to ensure that real life harassment is kept out of the game, and ensure that those who choose to involve themselves in such activities are no longer permitted to be part of our community."

      Hiding behind the old "within the EULA" defence now offers far less protection than it did last week.

      Delete
    9. the anonymous tear jar is kind of full i just need to know what to write on the label for yours

      Delete
    10. @wen tang: How about "Tears of laughter harvested on Falcon Punch Boomerang Day"? Too verbose? Meh, write whatever you want - your imaginary label on your imaginary internet space jar is of no real consequence to anyone except yourself.

      Delete
    11. better grab another jar they're filling up fast with all your comments

      Delete
    12. @DJ Entropy
      'but I am sure things will work out just fine :)'

      You mean with all the New Order being banned?

      Delete
    13. If the N.O.'s banned,
      why are miners exploding?
      Check and mate, carebears

      Delete
    14. Just saw two gankers explode. Don't worry the miners are fine :)

      Delete
  18. "The New Order isn't about killing miners--it's about saving them."

    Indeed. Although the decommissioning of their illegal equipment or pod is colloquially called "killing", the miner survives. The true e-bushido of the New Order continues (which our enemies claim falsely that we lack), as we participate in chat or mail to attempt tirelessly to save the miner and those around who witnessed and were traumatized by his bot-aspirant ways from themselves.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. All of this is recorded for historical reference and giggles of course. Is there any chance of you uploading some of these plz :)

      Delete
  19. Maria Malukker, you are my new favorite commenter. I propose that all trolls be answered in that form.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aww, thanks! I've just been feeling a yen for haiku lately, and it's been kinda fun to respond to windy carebears with the most succinct deflation possible. It's really surprising how much you can fit in so few syllables!

      Delete
  20. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  21. Falcon Punch: CCP Fights for Its Soul
    The buzz is all over EVE-O. Everyone is talking about it. They're calling it the "Falcon Punch".

    No, not that kind of Falcon Punch. This kind of Falcon Punch:

    "Hello everyone,

    We would like to remind the EVE community of our stance regarding the usage of EVE Online and assets, characters and items from within the game environment as leverage for the purpose of real life harassment.

    As outlined in our previous announcement, this type of behavior lies in clear breach of our End User License Agreement, and as such we have a zero tolerance approach when dealing with these cases.

    Our stance regarding this type of behavior has not changed since the last announcement, and any individuals who are found to be engaging in such behavior will be met with disciplinary action against their game accounts in accordance with our Terms of Service."

    To begin with, a little background info. The New Odor's crusade to revive the practice of permabanning hi-sec Shitlords has been tremendously successful. The gankbears have had enough, and they're begging CCP to put a stop to it. The evidence is all over the official EVE forums:

    "So, we don't have a list of people who have been banned, and we don't have a list of reasons why, just that its 'real life harassment.This is like a dictatorship executing political rivals for :reasons: I wish there was more transparency in these decisions, for all we know none of these people were even warned." (Lord Kailethre, Love Squad)

    "One of the characters that was permabanned was a logistics pilot hauling tens of billions of isk of crap for my corp in a corp jump freighter. Petitioned." (Mattalious, Infinite Technologies)

    "many of the bans had nothing to do with the bonus room... Players who had nothing to do with that were banned. One thing many had in common was CODE ." (IIshira, School of Applied Knowledge)

    Marathon tear threads have been posted. I've got news for all the gankbears who have reached their limit: We're only getting started. We're just getting warmed up!

    The next few pages contained the usual gankbear "emergent gameplay" tears. But things got interesting when CCP Falcon jumped back into the ring:

    "We will not draw a line in the sand so that people can skirt on the edge of it and bend the rules as much as possible. This isn't a debate about what constitutes "harassment". If you're not familiar with the word, find the definition in a dictionary and that will satisfy your question. What we will do, is continue to use best judgement on a case by case basis to ensure that real life harassment is kept out of the game, and ensure that those who choose to involve themselves in such activities are no longer permitted to be part of our community."

    It was a stunning rebuke--from a CCP developer and community manager, no less! 'Twas the Falcon Punch heard 'round the world. You can see it clear as day: the New Odor philosophy, distilled from the saltiest gankbear tears. It is alive today, even in the corridors of CCP headquarters.

    This didn't just happen. *We made it happen.*

    Permabanned Agents of the New Order, subscribe to Destiny. The rest of us are fighting the good fight. We're fighting for the future of highsec and all EVE. And you know what?

    *We're winning.*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 2/10, too many puns, not enough analysis.

      Delete
    2. Don't know how to write?
      Can't come up with new ideas?
      Copy/Paste, then....PUNS

      Delete
    3. High sec Shitlords' tears are the saltiest tears. Weep more, my pretties.

      Delete
    4. What's really funny is, you'd have said that no matter what we said. People could've posted nothing but "a;lskfj;aldkfgjlka;dshfglkasjh" and you'd have responded exactly the same way. Enjoy your perceived revenge, O Wronged Carebear. Just make sure you also buy a permit.

      Delete
    5. Maria Malukker, why, your tears are particularly mineral-laden today! You are full of woe, little one - has your account perhaps been permaband due to excessive Shitlording and dickishness? I pray not. If it hasn't, then be not worried, for am I now in a position to offer you the safety, security and protection of my patented Shitlord Permit! This permit guarantees* you protection from ebil CCP permabans!**




      Imma need about treefiddy isk for each permit.
























      *James Treefiddy assumes no responsibility or liability for any injury, loss, account ban or damage incurred as a result of any use or reliance upon the Shitlord Permit. Shitlord Permits are provided for entertainment purposes only.
      ***James Treefiddy assumes no responsibility or liability for any injury, loss, account ban or damage incurred as a result of any use or reliance upon the Shitlord Permit. Shitlord Permits are provided for entertainment purposes only.

      Delete
    6. Downgrading you to 0/10 due to tear obsession reaching critical boredom levels.

      Delete
    7. so the lesson is cry until you get what you want?

      Delete
    8. @Anon 1:48pm It worked for the gankbears! Hallelujah! And hey -- pssst! --- here's an inside tip: if you wanna see some REAL tears, check out any comment made by a CODE. member or Erotica 1 in the last 36 hours anywhere on teh whole wide intertubes. "BOO-FUCKING-HOO! Ebil CCP banned us!" LOL, much merriment is being had by all, watching their pleas for support from the community fall on deaf ears. Except Erotica 1s, of course: they're actually getting replies! Although the replies are all basically: "Fuck off, creep."

      Delete
  22. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  23. between the sour grapes and the carebear fapping I can't tell who was actually banned, if anyone :(

    ReplyDelete

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