Monday, November 6, 2017

Code Ready Gelhan, Part 24

Previously, on MinerBumping... The siege of the Gelhan system had turned into an occupation. Mission Ready Mining, EVE's sixth-largest corporation, no longer put up any armed resistance against the New Order; they merely shed tears in local chat and threatened to file petitions.


As they awaited the inevitable rejection of their petitions, the rebellious miners cursed our Agents for ruining EVE and destroying CCP's business.


Agent TheInternet TweepsOnline TheInternet wasn't willing to accept responsibility for CCP's downfall. Not until Lendar Silverwind presented evidence of his outrageous claim.


Lendar scoffed at the "moron" who got paid to "puff up that misleading garbage" about ganks improving player retention--otherwise known as CCP Rise.


TheInternet suspected that the fake-news-bearing miner was a Goofus. Just to be sure, he name-dropped the Saviour of Highsec. Lendar's reaction confirmed TheInternet's suspicions.


Our Agent didn't want the MRM miners to get the wrong impression. The New Order is a generous and merciful Order. To be sure, the miners were angry and unhappy. But they hadn't even tried the Code yet.


Lendar was boiling with rage. Maybe he really did need to mine to relax.


As Lendar continued to make a spectacle of himself, most of his fellow miners merely watched in stunned silence. How long would it be before someone higher in the MRM org chart intervened?


Lendar was summoned to the principal's office, but he refused to appear. No surprise there--the guy wouldn't even obey an Agent of the New Order.


A few hours later, miners attempted to mine in Gelhan again. They immediately attracted the attention of Code enforcement officers.


redneck atkinson, who had done nothing but cry in local earlier, bragged about his heroics.

(Click image for full size)

Georgia B Dixie was amused by the complaints about MRM being outnumbered by so many Agents. She'd spent most of her time taking on the corp of thousands all on her own.

(Click image for full size)

For whatever reason, redneck wanted to impress MyGirl Jaynara. Unfortunately, this encouraged MyGirl to propose that the two launch an attack against Agent Georgia. redneck had been too afraid to fire weapons at Georgia before. Would he do so now?

To be continued...

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Kills of the Week

Carebears, last week I warned you that there would be a reckoning. And so there was. Those who heeded the warning were able to save themselves. The rest died. During the week of October 29th @ 00:00 EVEtime through November 4th @ 23:59 EVEtime, an incredible 16 jump freighters and more than 50 freighters were killed in the name of the Code.


The scale of the carnage was unthinkable. More freighters were killed this week than during the original Burn Jita event. And they're still dying. Cling to the Code or be vanquished!



Lilith Eros of the inaptly named Try Not To Die corp jumped her jump freighter into Uedama and faced a lynch mob--no, a justice mob: Agents unknown boat, Sherri Rozei, Ruby Rozei, Christine Rozei, Ashley Whyte, Giselle Rozei, Shanade Rozei, unknown observer, Australian Excellence, Tax Collector Aruka, Taxman Daniel, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Tax Collector Kittens, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Max, Trump The King, Tax Collector Stroheim, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector BokChoy, Ivanka Rozei, Katy Rozei, Lagatha Rozei, Tawny Rozei, and Tom Jamess.


People often ask, "How do jump freighters die in highsec? Can't they use their jump drives to escape, even when they're being bumped?"
Lilith Eros > Yay fuckboys
Lilith Eros > So ... You gonna shoot me and die likes the scrubs you are
Lilith Eros > or just gonna do this all day
Lilith Eros > there we go
Australian Excellence > why no cyno?
Lilith Eros > No idea
Lilith Eros > Something about a session change
Ashley Whyte > bro where was your cyno
Lilith Eros > nvm its dead now
The solution to this mystery is that even when a jump freighter pilot isn't AFK, they may behave like a Goofus.



Florik Cadmus was on the lookout for those nasty multiboxing gankers. Confident that there weren't any groups of gankers nearby who were big enough to take down his ship, Florik went AFK. He had no idea that the New Order's Russian contingent, though smaller, had plenty of firepower thanks to its Taloses. Agents KaMiKaDzExD, tolstyk, Bastian Mart, Alarik Maleus, kali laska, Elizabet Hildebrand, Rachel O'Conor, KENTua, AndroGon Navy, Votre Dieu, Asakra, and Sumail Serine knocked out another dangerous enemy.



Of course, while all those freighters and jump freighters were dying, it's not as though the highsec miners were getting a pass. Serge Hunter quietly chewed rocks in a 0.9 security system, completely oblivious to the fact that he was being tracked by a crack team of miner gankers: Agents Maximus Gooseman, V-ktor Dolus, Razakien Okel, and Salah ad-Din al-Jawahiri. In addition to a full rack of 'Carpo' Mining Laser Upgrades, Serge had over 300 million isk worth of mining drones--sitting in his cargo.



Oldenfarten was convinced that highsec was totally, 100% safe. Isn't that what the carebears had demanded of CCP? He must've believed there wasn't the slightest possibility of losing his jump freighter. There's no other explanation for his 40 billion isk blunder. Oldenfarten is a bot-aspirant.

Agents Etrisa, Blasty McVoidFace, Ido Adudu, ClearLove, Lucita Pappotte, ZAKURELL0 LINDA, Franz Fizzleblade, SynthiaGreey, Yasashi konma, Jet Set Milly, SIR TANK, Nasagasa Bump, Rena Skjem, Collateralized Contracts, dAbOsSlAdY77, Private Panacan, Jack Fizzleblade, Lunar Love, Jayson Kusion, Jason Kusion, Richard Dan Gold, SKAfan, Bluekiss, Joshua Kusion, Joseph Kusion, Jackson Kusion, Jeremiah Kusion, Perlo Tissant, Urban Worrier, Karl Friedrich Fizzleblade, Selina Love, Archibald Fizzleblade, Hermann Fizzleblade, Johnathan Kusion, Kon Xanithex, Ganking Service, Hagen Fizzleblade, Gottfried Fizzleblade, Jasune Orda, Basic Black Bitch, Walther Fizzleblade, Mark Ormerant, Nion Nostro, Horace Goes Ganking, Rosanna Love, Justin Kusion, Joel Kusion, Jayden Kusion, Jake Kusion, Padme Love, Unfit ForDoody, Skafan Utisa, Chemical brother, bi mistuff, Tarwin JR, and Toadshroom Princess got on the mega killmail.

And just how did Oldenfarten manage to bloat his ship to 40 billion isk?


It doesn't help to have stuff like this in your cargo.



Lord Sarevok put all of his faith in his ability to tank his Bowhead: Reinforced bulkheads, bulkhead rigs, a damage control unit... but no mining permit. He had nearly a quarter of a million hitpoints, but he lacked the Code. That was enough to undo everything else. Agents Australian Excellence, Tax Collector HongMei, Tax Collector Kittens, Tax Collector Aruka, Taxman Daniel, Pod Destroyer Molly, Tax Collector Stroheim, Tax Collector Hill, Tax Collector Richard, Tax Collector BokChoy, Tax Collector Max, Tax Collector KarlMarx, Trump The King, Ruby Rozei, Tawny Rozei, Sherri Rozei, Lagatha Rozei, Christine Rozei, Giselle Rozei, Shanade Rozei, Katy Rozei, Procuror Ognev, Ivanka Rozei, Harletta Quinn, and Jay Riddick threw Taloses and stealth bombers into the fight. They won. Go on, deny that this was elite PvP. I dare you.



Lord Sarevok, having just lost his 30 billion isk Bowhead, certainly picked the wrong moment to be AFK. Otherwise he might've kept his pod from being added to the butcher's bill. Agent Baron Rozei lit it up and was rewarded with a nearly 6 billion isk killmail.


Silly carebears. You can't put turrets on a Bowhead. You can aim turrets at one, though.

Saturday, November 4, 2017

How CCP Can Save Itself and EVE Online

The EVE community is abuzz about the news that CCP has abandoned its VR focus and has terminated over 25% of its employees. Years ago, CCP put EVE on the back-burner and went all-in on VR. Now VR's out. CCP's new plan is to get in on the top floor of the mobile gaming market. Though CCP fired a good chunk of its staff, much of the downsizing related to its non-EVE employees.


However, CCP did eliminate nearly the entire EVE Community Team. For example, CCP fired CCP Phanton, the man responsible for locking my groundbreaking Manifesto and Manifesto II threads so many years ago. The threads, which are from the pre-Code era, provided much of the intellectual justification for what would ultimately become the Code. Dismissing these historic threads as mere "rants" (like the Declaration of Independence was a rant?), CCP Phantom tried to strangle the Code in its crib, so to speak. The Code survived. CCP Phantom did not.

Among the Community Team, CCP Falcon is the only notable member who has been confirmed not to have been terminated. The full extent of the CCP "banwave" isn't yet known. Reportedly, there are few if any layoffs among the EVE Development Team (those who design the game, rather than interacting with the community). CCP Fozzie remains at his post.

Naturally, these events have intensified the "EVE is dying" chatter, which has been growing steadily over the past few years. Clearly, CCP is in trouble, and so is EVE. How can they be saved? As always, the answer is for CCP to listen to me. CCP, you'll want to read MinerBumping especially carefully today.


HOW TO SAVE CCP AND EVE ONLINE

STEP ONE: FIX NULLSEC.

Nullsec is in a state of unprecedented crisis--which is to say, peace. In the nearly two and a half years since the introduction of FozzieSov, there have been no major wars in nullsec. Actually, there's one big exception: World War Bee (i.e., the Casino War). However, WWB/Casino War doesn't count in any meaningful sense when considering the health of nullsec, because it only occurred due to massive funding from the now-illegal EVE gambling sites. Since gambling sites can't fund any future wars, we need to look at major wars that occurred organically during the FozzieSov era. There haven't been any.

In the year and a half since the end of the Casino War, there have been no major wars in nullsec. None. Zero. And no, your alliance's little local conflict that nobody cares about didn't count as a "major war". Nor did your alliance's aborted attempt at a campaign that lasted a week and didn't accomplish anything. Major wars in EVE are events, and you know them when you see them. You can't miss 'em. They attract media attention, they reshape the map of nullsec, and they cause the number of logged-in EVE players to spike.

In short, they keep EVE going. Nullsec isn't going anywhere at the moment, it hasn't for a long time, and it doesn't appear to be going anywhere anytime soon. Nullsec is broken. Jump fatigue helped break it, and FozzieSov made sure it stayed broken.

Here's how to fix nullsec:

#1. Fix sov. Do it simply: One structure with one reinforcement timer that can be pre-set to last anywhere from 0 hours to 24 hours. That's it. Whoever shows up when the structure comes out of reinforcement and holds the field, gets sov.

"But James 315, we need a massive advantage for the defending side, and lots of intricate mechanics, and multiple timers spanning days."

No, you don't. All you need for a sov system is a simple mechanic that forces the defender to show up at a given time and win a fleet battle.

"But James 315, the defender needs lots of advance notice before a fight."

No, they don't. It's better to have a faster-paced system, even if that means not everybody can show up to the fight. If you lose, launch an organized counter-offensive.

"But James 315, the winner needs to have overwhelming force, otherwise there will be ping-ponging back and forth."

Good. Ping-ponging means the sides are actually fighting. A good sov system is one that encourages the underdog to at least try to win. You also want a system that tempts an attacker to action. When designing a sov system, you need to do everything to minimize the EVE player's natural risk-aversion, rather than maximizing it. Then action might take place.

#2. Delete jump fatigue.

There are ways to adjust jump fatigue to make it work properly, but that's too complicated for CCP. Get rid of it.

#3. Delete all supercaps.

Again, there are ways that supercaps can be adjusted to make them scale with the other ships and integrated into a rock-paper-scissors dynamic, rather than being an unstoppable apex force. Years ago, I wrote at some length about how to do this. However, it's complicated to pull it off, and CCP won't be able to get it right. Therefore, all supercaps should be deleted from the game.

"But James 315, Pandemic Legion would be very upset if this happened."

I remember PL before they became all about supercaps. If there's anything left of that PL, they'd do just fine in a post-supercap EVE.

"But James 315, some people spent years grinding isk to get their supercaps, or they PLEXed to buy supercaps using real money."

That's not what EVE is about.

#4. Delete remote reps.

There's a case to be made for remote reps on smaller ships, and there are probably some ways you could make remote reps not inhibit gameplay, but it's too complicated for CCP to get right. Eliminate them instead. The problem with remote reps has always been that they can make battles too one-sided. You need to tempt the underdog into battle, or else conflict won't take place. The idea that a powerful but losing fleet can inflict little damage because they can't quite break the remote-rep tank of the other side--that outweighs any benefits remote reps add to gameplay. Besides, remote reps have had their time in the sun for far too long. It's time to explore different metas.

#5. Make shifting, scarce resources.

Remember when tech moons were the big thing? Remember the technetium cartel? People complained that conspiracies to control tech would bring peace and stagnation to nullsec. Actually, the value and scarcity of tech in those days made them a conflict driver. Even when the cartel was functioning as intended, there was a lot more conflict and a lot more war in nullsec than there is now. The reason is that people had an incentive to try to conquer and defend space; some space was significantly more valuable than other space.

CCP should learn from that experience to create a couple different valuable, scarce resources, and then periodically shift their locations on the nullsec map. To make them amply desirable, these resources need to be bottleneck items that everyone needs, like technetium back in the day.

STEP TWO: GO ALL-IN ON THE CODE.

CCP tried Walking In Stations, World of Darkness, DUST 514, and VR. None of those things worked. They cost the company untold amounts of money. It's time for CCP to put its faith in something different--a good idea. Why not the Code?

#1. Nerf highsec PvE into oblivion.

Highsec rewards are far too great, considering highsec's low risk and and the convenience of highsec's trade hubs. PvE in highsec should offer almost no rewards at all. Delete incursions, higher-level missions, ice, mid-level ores, etc.

#2. Buff highsec PvP.

All of the anti-fun measures taken by CCP over the last several years should be reversed. Mining ships and freighters' EHP should be cut back down to size. Ore bays should be removed. Can-flipping should return: Delete the safety button and all crimewatch rules that discourage aggression games. Make wardecs cheap against corps and alliances of all sizes.

Increase the time it takes CONCORD to respond. Decrease its effectiveness.

Delete the faction police entirely.

#3. General amnesty for everyone banned for non-botting reasons.

Everyone who has ever been banned for anything other than botting should be unbanned. Think about all of the great players we'd get back. Imagine the headlines.

#4. Put my face on the one dollar bill.

Maybe not literally, but you get the idea. EVE has something really great and special with the Code, so CCP should promote it. Don't be embarrassed that people are actually generating content; acknowledge their effect on the game and its players. CCP should make the Code part of the EVE tutorial. They should end dev blogs with "Praise James!" Then people might read them again.

Until nullsec is fixed, the Code is all EVE has. Let's not pretend otherwise. Let's celebrate the Code and everything it has done for the game.

If you're one of CCP's remaining employees, now is not the time to wallow in misery. There's no need to torment yourselves with sleepless nights spent wondering how to get out of the mess you've made. You've got all the answers--everything you need to do--right here in this one MinerBumping post. I didn't even stretch it into a two-parter, though I certainly could have. Fixing EVE couldn't be easier. Get to it.

Friday, November 3, 2017

Powerful Acquaintances in Highsec, Part 2

Previously, on MinerBumping... Mike Jinsu's Covetor was defeated in honourable elite PvP by Spine Ripper, the ganker alt of Agent Bing Bangboom. Mike demanded the satisfaction of 1v1 combat, so Bing joined the convo and declared himself willing to duel. But Mike changed his mind, threatening to bring in powerful friends from his incursion fleet. Before long, the miner invited the mysterious Kalista Ohu to the convo.
Bing Bangboom > Hello Citizen!
Kalista Ohu > this is worser then the virus alert u get in your web browser
Mike Jinsu > Ikr
Kalista Ohu > Bing Bangboom 1010110100
Kalista Ohu > do u compute?
Mike and Kalista had an easy rapport, bouncing one-liners off each other like they were on a late-night talk show. Obviously Kalista was Mike's powerful incursion fleet friend.
Bing Bangboom > I only came because Mike said he wanted to duel but now he's decided to not.
Bing Bangboom > He said you would guard him mining though.
Kalista Ohu > would duel but yea
Kalista Ohu > busy dont got time to bs around with bs
Bing was still interested in taking Mike up on his offer for a duel; he was even willing to let Kalista tag-in for her friend. Unfortunately, Kalista didn't have time.
Mike Jinsu > I didn't say kalista would guard me
Mike Jinsu > I said my friends would
Mike Jinsu > Kalista just met me
...Then the other shoe dropped. Kalista wasn't Mike's powerful friend after all. No, she was merely an acquaintance. Acquaintances don't protect each other. They don't do much of anything for each other, really.
Bing Bangboom > ah, another carebear
Mike Jinsu > Wtf is with you and carebears
Kalista Ohu > i refuse to pay for something that is already free
Bing Bangboom > where are your friends then?
Mike Jinsu > Oh they're too busy to deal with fake people
Agent Bing had long suspected that Mike didn't actually have any friends. The fact that the miner had invited a mere acquaintance into the chat seemed to confirm this. Where did Mike meet Kalista, anyway? The "Help" channel?
Bing Bangboom > everyone pays... eventually. Or they quit
Mike Jinsu > You russians are gay as shit
Kalista Ohu > hes new af can u just let him play the fing game already lmao
Bing Bangboom > He only has to buy a permit and follow the Code
Though Kalista wouldn't put a ship on the line for someone she'd just met, she was willing to request that Bing allow Mike to mine.
Kalista Ohu > worser then the guy that got banned from co2
Kalista Ohu > follow me ass
Kalista Ohu > let him mine how about that
Bing Bangboom > Someone as helpless as himself should bow to the power of Highsec.
Mike Jinsu > Oh 0.6 isn't really highsec
Clearly, Mike needed help. But all Kalista would do is talk. As it turned out, Bing was a better friend to Mike than Kalista was--at least he was willing to sell the miner a permit.
Kalista Ohu > bow to pl and nc 1
Kalista Ohu > and then we can negociate!
Mike Jinsu > what are pl and nc 1
Bing Bangboom > Those alliances have no power in highsec. Here it's us.
Mike Jinsu > oh
Mike's acquaintance invoked the authority of Pandemic Legion and some entity apparently named Northern Coalition One. But in highsec, it's the mighty CODE. alliance that everyone needs to worry about.
Bing Bangboom > He CAN mine. He just has to buy a permit and follow the Code.
Kalista Ohu > bamg ccp doesnt require "permit" to mine
Bing Bangboom > true
Bing Bangboom > we do
Mike Jinsu > I'm gonna contact them
Bing Bangboom > please do
Mike lost faith in his acquaintance's ability to negotiate on his behalf for a peaceful resolution (i.e., one that didn't require the bot-aspirant to part with any of his precious isk). The only alternative left--other than the powerful incursion friends he'd so far declined to call in--was to file a petition with anyone still working for CCP.
Bing Bangboom > Kill: Mike Jinsu (Covetor)
Bing Bangboom > just to be sure you see what he was mining in
Bing Bangboom > Kill: Mike Jinsu (Capsule) and he was AFK
Mike Jinsu > I wasn't afk lol
Bing Bangboom > Its impossible to catch a pod that isn't AFK
Mike's denials fell flat. Carebears, when your pod gets killed by one of our Agents, that's prima facie evidence that you were AFK.
Mike Jinsu > Well
Mike Jinsu > I was trying to go to an ore site
Mike Jinsu > and was waiting for my drones to come
Mike Jinsu > when you popped up
Bing Bangboom > ta dah!
Mike Jinsu > I don't use implants for this EXACT reason
The miner smugly noted that he doesn't use implants due to the ever-present threat of our gankers. In a sense, this is an even bigger victory for the Code than when our gankers destroy an expensive pod: The carebear didn't even get to use any implants in the first place.
Bing Bangboom > ah...
Bing Bangboom > how about the Covetor?
Mike Jinsu > Don't care
Mike Jinsu > it's only 30 mil
Bing Bangboom > which is more than 10 million... just sayin'
Mike Jinsu > I'll just mine somewhere else FOR FREE
Mike Jinsu > Smart ons
Bing effortlessly demolished all of Mike's excuses. Then our Agent noticed that Kalista had been silent for a while.
Bing Bangboom > Your friend left
Mike Jinsu > i know and hes not my friend
Bing Bangboom > I saw that. He wouldn't even guard you mining.
Mike Jinsu > I didn't ask him to
Mike Jinsu > and I wouldn't
The "powerful acquaintance in highsec" gambit had failed. Now it was time for Bing to close in for the sale. Would the miner be smart enough--or feel helpless enough--to buy a mining permit?

To be continued...

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Powerful Acquaintances in Highsec, Part 1

We've seen how heroically our Agents conduct themselves when dealing with a Gallant miner or with a hardened bot-aspirant. But how should an Agent of the New Order deal with ambiguity?
Mike Jinsu > Nice kill
Mike Jinsu > I gotta give you that
Mike Jinsu > But you shouldn't have made enemies with me :)
Mike Jinsu > I got some nice friends
Covetor pilot Mike Jinsu was terminated by ganker from the mighty CODE. alliance. On the one hand, Mike offered his sincere congratulations to the ganker. On the other hand, the miner also made empty threats and pretended to have powerful friends.


Agent Spine Ripper, the ganker alt of Bing Bangboom, is one of the longest-serving members of New Order Logistics. Bing is an optimist. The miner had offered the equivalent of a "gf", so maybe he'd be willing to buy a mining permit. Spine Ripper invited the miner to a private convo.
Spine Ripper > Hello Citizen!
Mike Jinsu > Oh here we go
Spine Ripper > It was only your non-Code compliance that got you killed.
Mike Jinsu > Oh is that right?
Mike Jinsu > So do I really need my battleship friends to protect me when i mine?
Mike Jinsu > Is that how you wanna play
If Bing wanted to play hardball, Mike was more than ready. If necessary, he had powerful friends who were willing to sit around watching him mine all day.
Spine Ripper > they can't protect you
Mike Jinsu > Of course they can
Spine Ripper > only a permit and following the Code can protect you from us
Mike Jinsu > Huh
Mike Jinsu > From you tiny catalyst
Spine Ripper > My tiny Catalyst has killed thousands.
Mike Jinsu > Yeah cuz you did it smart
More ambiguity: Mike admitted that the gank was well executed. Yet something seemed to hold him back from embracing the Code.
Mike Jinsu > Why don't I ask my whole incursion fleet to fight you
Spine Ripper > Ask them
Mike Jinsu > Wanna 1v1 me?
Mike Jinsu > I'm getting my raven
Mike Jinsu > My raven against your catalyst
It was time to fight. Mike had an entire incursion fleet at his disposal; apparently they were willing to take a break from grinding isk to chase Spine Ripper around an asteroid belt.
Spine Ripper > I can't fight long in highsec... the police come... can I send my alt?
Mike Jinsu > We can duel
Bing Bangboom > duel?
Mike Jinsu > Holy shit
Mike Jinsu > What is with you dumbasses
Mike Jinsu > You think you can make me cough up 10 million
At the mention of a 1v1, Spine Ripper invited his main character, Bing Bangboom, to join the convo. Bing enjoys 1v1s.
Spine Ripper > only if you want to do PvE in our systems
Mike Jinsu > They're not your fucking systems
Spine Ripper > technically you are right.
Spine Ripper > They belong to James 315
Mike Jinsu > You sound just like nazis
Mike Jinsu > Wtf is wrong with you
Mike Jinsu > People are just tryna play the game
Now the miner was entering what you might call the "flopping around like a fish out of water" stage of the conversation. Mike couldn't make up his mind whether he had powerful friends, or was willing to engage in a duel himself, or was a defenseless newbie who should be left alone.
Spine Ripper > We are law enforcement... have you even read the Code?
Spine Ripper > www.minerbumping.com
Bing Bangboom > ready to duel
Bing Bangboom > I don't have a Cat... can I bring a frigate?
Mike Jinsu > No I'm not dueling a frigate with a battleship
Mike Jinsu > Why are you people so retarded
As an elite PvP'er, Bing was willing to cut Mike a break by dueling him with a mere frigate. Strangely, this scared Mike.
Bing Bangboom > OK, thought you wanted to duel
Bing Bangboom > guess it was just miner talk
Mike Jinsu > You think you're so big
Bing Bangboom > I'm an Agent of the New Order... so yeah, I am
Bing was a little disappointed. Rebels claim that our Agents don't shoot ships that can shoot back, but whenever one shows a willingness to do so, the rebels run for cover.
Bing Bangboom > Are you getting your incursion friends to come guard you mining?
Mike Jinsu > Why would I tell you?
Mike Jinsu > and why the fuck would I mine when I can run incursions
Mike Jinsu > Fuck off I'll never give you a penny for any bullshit
Mike went from mixed signals to total confusion. Did he have friends in an incursion fleet? Did he run incursions at all? Was he a miner? Did he want to duel, or did he want to be left in peace?
Bing Bangboom > I don't know... why anyone mines is kind of a mystery to me
Mike Jinsu > Yeah
Mike Jinsu > Why mine when you can scam noobs
Bing Bangboom > I just showed up for the promised duel. Where is the duel?
Mike Jinsu > No duel
One thing was certain: The miner wasn't willing to put his battleship where his mouth was. There would be no duel that day--except with words.
Bing Bangboom > I figured as much
Bing Bangboom > about as real as your incursion friends.
Mike Jinsu > They're real
Bing Bangboom > no, they're not
Mike Jinsu > Oh yes buddy
Bing Bangboom > Your ore is still out here
Though Mike suggested that nobody would mine if they could run incursions, the miner insisted that he was an incursion runner.
Mike Jinsu > Ask Salheim Pserad
Mike Jinsu > He's an FC for my fleet
Bing Bangboom > He looks like another carebear to me
Mike Jinsu > Oh and what are you
Bing Bangboom > I told you. I'm an Agent of the New Order
Mike Jinsu > Hear that Kalista?
Kalista Ohu > wow u guys really want this shit
Out of nowhere, Mike invited someone named Kalista Ohu to the convo. Was she his powerful friend--and did Bing stand a chance in a duel against her?

To be continued...

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

The Talk of Highsec

There are casual gamers, and then there are lazy gamers.


Vohkeheva sehe Edier lost a lazy-fit Covetor. Apparently AFK, the miner also lost his 396 million isk pod.


Being ganked inspired Vohkeheva to become more active than he'd been while his ship was still alive. He lit up Scheenins local with his protests.


"Huh?" Miners condemn themselves with such questions.


Good Samaritan Learza Thiesant informed Vohkeheva about the Code. The miner was ignorant. Dangerously so.


Vohkeheva couldn't believe that he'd need to pay a token fee to legally mine in New Order territory. But when Agent Fate and Destiny showed up, she confirmed everything Learza had said.


The miner was baffled: PvP in highsec? That wasn't the EVE he remembered. True, things were different before the Code. They're much better now.


Agent Fate was curious about the miner's aptitude for EVE, so she used a classic litmus test: Mention the name of the Saviour of Highsec. The miner's reaction to it will tell you everything you need to know.


Let the record reflect that Vohkeheva chose to be angry and upset. He was given the option of calming down and reading the Code. He didn't take it.


The Code is the ultimate content generator--and the ultimate conversation starter. Other players in the Scheenins system saw people talking about the most important subject in EVE, so they wanted to join the conversation.


Tobin Enchari was one of those "the Code used to be cool" guys. He mourned the end of bumping, which apparently nobody does anymore. (Tell that to the freighter pilots--or the miners of Mission Ready Mining, for that matter.)


Vohkeheva maintained his innocence: He wasn't AFK, he was just too slow to escape with his zero-align-time pod in bubble-free highsec.


In truth, miners get plenty of warning about the Code, especially since it's pretty much the only thing people talk about in highsec. But you need to be at your computer to read local.


Tobin offered his services as a pro bono space lawyer. Fate and Destiny ignored his nonsense. The explosion of unlicensed miners was more than enough proof of her authority as an Agent of the New Order.

Top Supporters for October 2017

Each month, MinerBumping immortalizes its top isk contributors in a hall of fame post. The "Month's Top Supporters" sidebar will begin showing the current month's supporters in a few days. You can view the August 2012, September, October, November, December, January 2013, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December, January 2014, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December, January 2015, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December, January 2016, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September, October, November, December, January 2017, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, and September top 10 lists at the appropriate links.

Here are our top isk contributors for October 2017:

TOP SUPPORTERS
October 2017



#1. Black Pedro
1,000,000,000 isk



#2. Kalysta Sabathiel
315,000,000 isk



#3. Yucie Van Burean
200,000,000 isk



#4. Viirilithizu Ward
150,000,000 isk



#5. Aeonaa Kalfren
100,000,000 isk



#5. Koizumi Taira
100,000,000 isk



#7. Charly Rollard
50,000,000 isk



#7. Viktor Rain
50,000,000 isk



#9. Corporal Punishment08
20,000,000 isk



#10. Katy Melons
10,000,000 isk

October 2017 will be remembered, I think, as the month when all the carebears and bot-aspirants and rebels and Anti-Gankers cried. Granted, all the other months will be viewed similarly, as all the carebears and bot-aspirants and rebels and Anti-Gankers cried then, too. But still.

And our shareholders helped make that happen! Well done, heroes.