Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Tears of the Day: Codification

Some people think I take a sadistic pleasure in bumping miners out of range. Not true. If I had my way, every miner would follow the Code and there would be no need for me to perform even a single bump.


I related this truth to some miners in Halaima, the birthplace of our empire. Highsec miner To'Kor was bumped out of range and retreated to the station, where he remained for the rest of my visit. Still sore, he interrupted my monologue with his cynicism.


...and he dropped the Führerbomb in record time. Remember kids, being bumped out of mining range is like the Holocaust.


Next, To'Kor challenged the legitimacy of my rule:


I questioned his assertion that his website was 100,000 times better than MinerBumping.com. In fact, I was pretty confident that my website was better than his, so I let him know it.


To'Kor was confident that he could write better code than the Supreme Protector. Not likely. My Code beats any other code in EVE, hands-down.


But To'Kor didn't think I was even the author of the Code. Outrageous.


While the Code reflects the best aspirations and ideals of highsec, I was the one who wrote it down, and obviously I deserve credit for that.


At first, To'Kor refused to even go to my website to read my Code, but I had at least made it available. Where was his oh-so-great code?


To'Kor finally visited MinerBumping.com and was unimpressed. He claimed his own best code was inaccessible, because he codes for the United States Department of Defense (i.e. the U.S. military).


I persisted. Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. A code 100,000 times better than my Code? I think that qualifies as extraordinary.


Finally, he relented and gave me the URL for a website where he had done some coding.


I was not impressed by To'Kor's code. It was a lot of hype for nothing, to be honest.


However, we may have been operating on different wavelengths.

25 comments:

  1. Grade 'A' Entertainment! Still not a 100% sure what anyone was talking about but I can be absolutely sure I enjoyed it!

    Mono (not anonymous)

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  2. I would hope that someone who codes for the DoD would be able to easily recognise a Blogger blog from a a custom coded blogging solution. Just shows how pathetically trustfulness some violators make themselves. Still, we must not lose hope for them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. trustless*

      I need to start spell-checking :S

      Delete
    2. Really you need code to help you with that.

      Delete
  3. It took him quite long to get it...
    sad face if he really codes for DOD

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  4. Codecodecodecodecode! Codecodecode! Codecode! Coooooooodde!

    Hilarity, as always, James. I'm currently waiting the requisite 10 hours to biomass an alt and make a new one who shall be groomed specifically as your acolyte. Whenever a lull in my typical day to day activities occurs, I shall be out there fighting the good fight along side you!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Most holy texts of canon have been translated to many different languages.

    Some large mining populations (like germans or russians) are doomed to miss out on the details of the oncoming highsec renaissance.

    Isn't there, among the flock, a devout scribe who could translate the Code in said languages?

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  6. I agree with To'Kor. You can't just come and declare yourself the ruler of some systems, and suddenly expect everyone to happily embrace your tyrannical rule. If I was actually affected by your e-peen-empire, I would go purchase a bunch of PLEX, hire a dozen or five Goons and get them to destroy you and anyone supporting you, rather than paying up the fucking 10 million ISK. It may sound stupid, but it would be worth it, regardless.

    If successful, you would be killed and your "Invincible" Stabber would be gone. If they failed, a bunch of Goons would die in a CONCORD-ignited fire. Either way, it would be a win-win for me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, now that I think twice about it, Goons would die in a CONCORD-ignited fire whether they were successful in destroying you or not. Even better for me, as I hate both you and Goons more than the US-government hates the Al Queda and the Jews hated Nazi Germany during WW2. Just to put my hate for you into perspective.

      Delete
    2. My rule isn't tyrannical in any way though. It's always going to be better to pay me my 10 million isk once per year than make a failed attempt to kill my Invincible (no scare-quotes) Stabber.

      Delete
    3. No, not really. And I never said that I would be the one trying to kill your Stabber. I said I would rather hire Goons to do it than pay you. Learn to read before saying stupid things.

      Also, yes, your rule is tyrannical. You come in, steal money from the hard-working miners, bump them out of mining-range and expect them to love you for it. You're either a sociopath or a tyrant (or more likely both).

      Delete
    4. And why would goons shoot one of their own?

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    5. You can't prove that James is a Goon. And besides, between The Mittani and James, The Mittani is definitely the lesser of two evils. I'd rather have Goons do a non-stop High-sec Ice-Interdiction, than see James claim all of High-sec. At least Goons usually do stuff for a proper reason. James just does his shit because he's a griefer.

      Delete
    6. I am not a Goon. I used to be in Goonfleet, but that was a long time ago. I am not a griefer, I am the opposite of that--healer, I guess? And how do you say AFK miners are "hard-working"? How can it be "work" if it's automated?

      Delete
    7. And how exactly does stealing from those who can't fight back make you a healer? Easy. It doesn't. If anything you're a half-way reverse Robin Hood. You steal from the poor and keep the money. Even AFK-mining is more work than warping to a belt, typing a few words and getting money, and then bumping the morons who pay you anyway.

      Also, by your twisted logic, Manufacturers shouldn't be allowed to earn ISK either, since they do even less actual work and get huge sums of ISK for the little amount of effort invested.

      Delete
    8. Wow! I disagree with pretty much everything you just said. First, I don't steal, I levy and collect what amounts to a tax. Second, I don't take from the poor, since no one who can afford a mackinaw is poor. Third, the amount I charge is a very small and reasonable fee. Fourth, AFK-mining is less work than anything, including bumping. Fifth, I do not bump people who pay. Sixth, the people who pay are not morons. Seventh, manufacturers put more work (and thought) into what they do than AFK miners.

      Delete
    9. Channeling Eno Bray there for a moment, James?

      Delete
    10. Heh. I did think of Mr. Bray as I was writing that, actually. I've got nothing against lists!

      Delete
    11. Hello Mister Anonymous,

      I would be happy to take this contract for the sum of 5 billion isk. As you may already know, Goonswarm is a highly regarded mercenary alliance & we have completed thousands of contracts to date. It would be our honour to do this thing for you.

      Delete
  7. A common misconception among rebel forces, but actually I am awesome.

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  8. That's only your subjective opinion, not the objective opinion of everyone in EVE. Until you provide proof that the miners you steal ISK from actually think you're awesome, I refuse to listen to any of yor stupid claims.

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  9. Stick around! There are plenty of posts to be made, and some of them involve those who are redeemed and join the New Order.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I find this humorous. this is essentially against bot mining, do you really think CCP is against this? if all you have to do to prove i'm not a bot miner is follow a few short and simple rules and pay a measly 10 million isk to maintain a spot in a belt, why can't you pay the measly fee?

    Oh, pity to thee that must make up excuses to not pay 10 mill isk whilst thy sits in a mining barge worth +170 mill isk. Oh, you have drones? Do tell how your drones prevent bumping, i must insist on that one. -sigh- i fear the idiocy that has taken hold of EVE Online Miners. I don't see why a list of bot/unresponsive players isn't sent to CCP for botting suspicions. it would make mining a helluva lot better for real miners. http://memegenerator.net/instance/31543516

    While i may not entirely agree with the operations, if it stops bot mining then why go against it? so he gets paid as well, 10 mill or all it takes to replace the modules and the ship that further takes from your profits. besides, 10 million isk... or that 3.5 billion isk plan to attempt to get out of paying 10 million isk?

    if this is to be seen as appeasement, I prefer my profits to be in the black. And this concludes my rant against anti-logic.

    Drone577

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    Replies
    1. and yes, i used a meme generator. it seems to be highly effective at driving a point across these days... so very saddening...

      Delete

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