Saturday, October 27, 2012

Petitioners Cling to False Hope

For the past four months, hundreds of miners have petitioned me and my Agents for daring to bring change to highsec. Since the New Order is nice and legal, every petition has been denied. Yesterday, I wrote about a miner who paid an Agent 150 million isk for mining permits after receiving a rejected petition.

That hasn't stopped some miners from encouraging others to file more petitions.

No matter how many hundreds of anti-bumper petitions get rejected, some rebels continue to cling to false hope. For some reason, they always think their petition will be accepted. And when it's not, behold their reaction:

No matter how much CCP does to help the miners, the miners will always turn against them the moment they don't get 100% of what they want. There's just no pleasing some people.

A common miner refrain is that the only reason the bumpers haven't been banned yet is because not enough petitions have been filed. I have a feeling they underestimate just how many have been filed over the last few months.

Ice miner Brian Ragle proclaimed to everyone in the Tolle system that salvation was at hand.

Some GMs prefer to let the miners down easy, telling them their complaints will be "investigated". You might recall a similar situation last month, when a miner was told the GM would "look into it and take the appropriate action". (The appropriate action was to sit back, smile, and watch the New Order grow.)

Despite getting a form response, Brian was enthusiastic and encouraged more petitioning.

This is apparently the rebels' big plan to defeat the New Order. Brian told everyone that if they word their petitions just the right way, they might get accepted instead of rejected. Like a magic spell, I suppose.

Brian's hated enemies continued to bump freely while Brian sat helplessly out of mining range. If this is what "works", I'd hate to see what constitutes a failure.

Audrik Villalona is an ice miner and a self-proclaimed enemy of the New Order. Even he found the petitioning effort pathetic.

Upon being informed that his petitions were a Red Pennable offense, Brian was appalled. Could another petition be underway?

If you're a miner and you're tempted to join the resistance, take another look at these rebels. Their only hope of defeating the New Order is to file a bunch of petitions and annoy the GMs. I think we all know who is going to win this war. Resistance is frivolous.


  1. "Brian's hated enemies continued to bump freely while Brian sat helplessly out of mining range. If this is what "works", I'd hate to see what constitutes a failure."

    Imo their entire gameplay it's a failure and maybe this is the reason he can't see his fail.

  2. Thank you, petitioning miners, for contributing to the game by actually doing something other than clicking 1 button every 3/4 of an hour.

    Dear Eve GMs being assaulted with all those petitions,

    I apologize on behalf of the misguided unfortunates who think they are given more rights than anyone else and must send in those petitions. I'm sure it is not our intention to have you bothered with such frivolities, but thank you just the same for still doing a thankless job.

    ~Murk Paradox

  3. One thing I've never understood is why people think that they need to tell everyone that they have filed a petition/hit the report button/etc.

    Every time I've complained to GMs about a player in a game, I have never felt the need to tell the player that I have done so.

    If I was still playing Eve, and was a miner (I find mining too boring), and I decided to petition an agent of the New Order*, you would not know about my petition unless the GMs decided to do something. Even then, you would never know I had filed it, only that the GMs had taken action.

    *Chances are I'd be reporting someone who infiltrated the New Order and is breaking the rules to make the New Order look bad.

    1. as an extension to that, why do people hit the notify checkbox when you set terrible standings. why do we care if we're set to bad standings?

    2. As a final word I'd guess. I hear my kids use "I'm telling!" as a threat all the time. Sounds like these people grew up under that same doctrine.

      "Ha! Take that Tonto!"

      I dunno.

      ~Murk Paradox


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