Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Powerful Friends in Nullsec

During the waning days of our Gallente vacation, I happened upon a non-compliant miner in Aydoteaux. Pretty much everyone else had paid for a permit, but MoltenFury was running late.

I try to frame Code-compliance as a positive thing--as an opportunity. Some people will open the door when opportunity knocks. With others, opportunity must bump down the door.

MoltenFury repeatedly returned to the ice field. He eventually stopped giving me the carebear stare with his Mackinaw, but he gave me the silent treatment. Suddenly and without warning, I received a request for a private convo. Was he ready to pay?

No, it was only the "Powerful friends in nullsec" line from Miner Bingo. If I didn't stop bumping him, the entire GoonSwarm Federation could be enlisted against me! I wanted to reason with MoltenFury by reminding him that his threats were totally empty, but he abruptly left the convo before I could get a word in.

When words fail, bumps succeed. Through my actions, I attempted to demonstrate that I knew he was nothing but an ordinary highsec ice miner with no powerful alts or friends at his disposal.

MoltenFury sailed off into the night, never to be seen again. It's a funny thing, in all our months of bumping miners, we have yet to encounter anyone who can actually summon allies from nullsec to come attack us. Rebellious miners, you have been abandoned by your so-called "friends"! Join the New Order, and you will have a family that will never let you down.


  1. Back in the days was "i have friends in BOB" now they change this to Goons, but is the same empty threat.

  2. As a TEST member, I'll tell you what I'll do if anyone ever complains to me about James 315. First I'll drop cloak (because cloaks are fun) and yellow box him, then I'll say "Hi James 315, Saviour of High Sec" in local and proceed to start bumping!

  3. MoltenFury is clearly unaware of James 315's history. Only a pubbie could make that mistake. We are also a CIA front, so run for the hills.

  4. Even if what he said was true, its completely irrelevant what corporation you belong to, I couldnt care less if its Goons or from lala land, they have to pay for permits as well, and if they are bots they will be dealt with just the same.

  5. im from the Goon. Dont interfere with toons of goonies r we will use alpha fleet to pvp ur ship,,,just saying

    - a GOON

    1. im from the CCP. I cross referenced your IP with our logs and you are not a goon. Stop lying, dog.

      - a CCP

    2. im from the Test. Dont interfere with toons of testies r we will use foxcat fleet to pvp ur ship,,,just saying

      - a TEST

    3. I am the Mittani.

      This guy speaks the truth.

      (Allowing people to choose their own name for comments is awesome)

  6. crab nicholson extremeNovember 14, 2012 at 11:22 PM

    I can't see a goon taking the game this seriously. I just can't. :/

  7. It's true! I heard Glenn Beck say it!
    -Galaxy Pig


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